A lot of people know that I have done some work with a wonderful trainer named Emazon over the last several months. She has helped me to recall a lot about who I truly am. My authentic, inner self has come out to play a little since I have worked with her. The experience has helped me to transform the way I think. More information on Emazon’s work can be found on her website, at http://www.emazon.tv/
I have experienced several breakthroughs in the last few weeks that I have blogged about in recent posts. I have had issues with allowing the numbers (scales and measurements) to impact the way I feel about my journey. I have realised that I was raised with abuse in my family, and that some of the things said to me as a teen are still impacting the way I feel about myself now. The issues with the numbers have been ongoing for several months now, but the others have been occurred only in the last few weeks, and while some have hit me harder than others, I have been finding it challenging to come to terms with them.
Emazon teaches people how to block out what she calls blue noise. All the things that other people put on us. The conditioning, the expectations, all the things that mask our true selves and move us further away from living as we are meant to. A few days ago she posted on her facebook wall:
I am going to keep saying it over and over and over again like a beating drum so it reaches the core of you. ‘Do not buy into the drama’. If it/they can seduce you to buy into drama, It/they can penetrate your bubble. If It/they can penetrate your bubble, it/they can vampire your power. Do not buy into the drama. – Emazon
Reading these words have struck a chord with me. I have realised that the things that penetrate the bubble aren’t necessarily just from external sources. Other people, events and so on. They can also be from internal sources.
And I have been allowing my internal voices to penetrate. I have allowed the numbers to rule my being for too long. I have allowed the actions of others from my childhood to influence my worth for too long. I deserve complete unconditional acceptance and love. And I intend to give that to myself.